Book Recs – Sam Stark

I’m not at all surprise that this book is as comprehensive and well put together as it is. I don’t want to say that I expected it, because that sounds entitled, but I do find a certain amount of comfort when tuning in to author Sara Steel’s podcast “Let’s Talk About Sects.” Every episode is researched, professionally discussed, engaging, and compassionate. She interviews cult survivors/leavers, giving them a platform on which they can tell their stories without judgement or confrontation—a rare and wonderful thing, and then gives you a very straightforward “this is what happened, here are the facts.” The only difference between her podcast and this book, is that the book is looking at things on a much larger scale.

At the heart of being human is the desire to belong. It can make us unspeakably vulnerable to the manipulations of others. Cult leaders prey on this desire, but so do many unscrupulous operators hiding in plain sight.

Sarah Steel, the creator of the popular ‘Let’s Talk About Sects’ podcast, has researched the cults you’ve heard of – and dozens you haven’t. What strikes her most are not the differences between bizarre cult behaviour and ‘normal’ behaviour but the depressing similarities. Her work reveals that we are all susceptible to the power of cult dynamics.

In Do As I Say, Sarah Steel tells the human tale behind the sensationalism. Sharing deeply personal stories, gathered over years of interviews with survivors, and some shocking tales about the world’s most famous cults, she sheds light on the high cost of unchecked coercive behaviours to individuals and communities at large.

“Do as I Say” takes key points from Sarah’s interviews from a number of different sects and weaves them all together to spotlight behaviors and practices we as a culture/society need to be mindful of. There is also a well-thought-out layout of cultic terms and defining characteristics—basically things to ask yourself about groups you may be suspicious of, or perhaps an organization or church you are a part of. Sarah also shines light on the trials survivors go through just by leaving, which I believe is the most important takeaway this book has to offer.

As a survivor of abuse, I cannot recommend this book enough, especially for those who struggle with past (or current) relationship trauma or find themselves repeatedly in situations where they are undermined or coerced into giving up their autonomy. For the rest of you, read it to gain some insight into ways you can be aware and mindful of people that may need help, or even to just learn how to be a better friend, listener, and human being.

Last, but not least, I have to say from a professional standpoint, Sarah has done a fantastic job narrating this book. The same professionalism, compassion, and once in a while splash of humor I’ve grown to love on her podcast, shine through here, making a sometimes heavy listen an excellent experience.

I’ve been lax at updating this blog, so I thought I would take a few minutes to review a book I read yesterday. The book is “Summer Sons” by Lee Mandelo, and it’s awesome.

Andrew and Eddie did everything together, best friends bonded more deeply than brothers, until Eddie left Andrew behind to start his graduate program at Vanderbilt. Six months later, only days before Andrew was to join him in Nashville, Eddie dies of an apparent suicide. He leaves Andrew a horrible inheritance: a roommate he doesn’t know, friends he never asked for, and a gruesome phantom with bleeding wrists that mutters of revenge.

As Andrew searches for the truth of Eddie’s death, he uncovers the lies and secrets left behind by the person he trusted most, discovering a family history soaked in blood and death. Whirling between the backstabbing academic world where Eddie spent his days and the circle of hot boys, fast cars, and hard drugs that ruled Eddie’s nights, the walls Andrew has built against the world begin to crumble, letting in the phantom that hungers for him.

Okay.

I’ve seen this novel compared to Maggie Stiefvater’s “Raven Cycle” series a few times and I agree. There are many, many elements of this story that mirror and compliment that one. However, it must be said that this book is far more adult and far less whimsical.

But trust me, that’s a good thing. Seriously, read this book.

This story is about grieving. Bottom line. The pain Andrew is going through after losing his best friend Eddie is visceral. If you’ve experienced loss of a loved one, some of this will be hard to get through because it will cut a very deep and familiar path through your heart. Compound that with the anxiety of coming into your sexuality and coming out? It’s a powder keg of raw, real shit. And I’m so here for it.

If you’re not a fan of slow burns, then you should probably get out now. This story’s pace is edging at its finest. Masterfully holding on to its tension and keeping us from any kind of respite or relief for so long that when it all starts to finally unravel It. Is. Exquisite.

I cannot recommend this book enough.

A few extra thoughts: The horror elements are subtle at first but unlike the slow burn of the story, they amp up pretty quickly. There’s a fair amount of gore, especially toward the end, but nothing so traumatizing it needs mentioning. That being said, I should put a warning for suicide and suicidal themes here. Please proceed with caution if this is something that triggers you.

There are also heavy sexual themes, and yes, there is sex (fist pump). It’s not overly graphic, but it’s not a fade to black either. The romance element of this story is a bit in the background but at the same time, it’s one of the main cogs driving things forward. You’ll understand once you read it. It’s excellent, trust me.

And last, but certainly not least, I am ecstatic over the trans representation. Thank you, Lee Mandelo for writing a major character who is trans but not having their “transness” be their defining feature.

In closing: Read This Fucking Book.